Joshua Phan » Poetry

Hey

CraZy-511 — Sat, 09 Jan 2010 17:48:10 +0000

Hey Future Love,

I didn’t know how to start this letter

Dear, or hello, couldn’t decide which sound better.

I went for the informal because I’m not trying to impress

Try to make it laid back so there’s no need to stress.

I know I don’t know your name—but someday I hope

We’ll meet on the street and no longer be alone.

Sometimes I gaze up at the stars and imagine how it will be—

Where will it happen? Will you just turn and look at me?

Will we discover the meaning of “love at first sight?”

Perhaps it will take one or two nights—

Laying out under the stars and discovering the mysteries

Asking questions that have eluded the minds of many for centuries.

Maybe it will be our laughter that floats in the air—

That makes us turn in the right direction, at that moment, right there.

Our eyes will meet, and it will be just like in a movie

We’ll smile at each other, and you’ll ask me out for a cup of coffee.

Oh the possibilities, they haunt me in my sleep

All the secrets I want to share but for now I keep.

Each poem I write makes me somehow feel closer to you

Based on emotions that I know to be true.

When life gets me down, I look up at the night sky

For a long moment, I’m silent but eventually I’ll sigh—

Someday we’ll meet, and it’ll be like we had never been apart

Because you know when you’ve found the one

That completes your heart.

Future.

CraZy-511 — Fri, 08 Jan 2010 17:32:49 +0000

Close my eyes….
Let the whole thing pass me by
There is no time to waste, asking why.
I need to let go of this pride.

I’ll run away with you by my side
I think about your face and how I fall into your eyes…
The outline that I trace around the one that I call mine.
Time that called for space unclear where you drew the line…
I don’t need to solve this case, and I don’t need to look behind.

Do I expect to change the past I hold inside?
All the words that I say, repeating over in my mind.
Some things you can’t erase, no matter how hard you try.
An exit to escape is all there is left to find.

Choose life

CraZy-511 — Mon, 15 Jun 2009 09:48:00 +0000

For someone special

CraZy-511 — Sat, 25 Apr 2009 18:35:00 +0000

There are moments in life when you miss someone so much that you just want to pick them from your dreams and hug them for real!

When the door of happiness closes, another opens; but often times we look so long at the closed door that we don’t see the one that has been opened for us.

Don’t go for looks ; they can deceive. Don’t go for wealth; even that fades away. Go for someone who makes you smile, because it takes only a smile to make a dark day seem bright. Find the one that makes your heart smile.

Dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go; be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you want to do.

May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human, and enough hope to make you happy.

The happiest of people don’t necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.

The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; you can’t go forward in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.

When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling. Live your life so at the end, you’re the one who is smiling and everyone around you is crying.

Don’t count the years — count the memories………..

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take; but by the moments that take our breath away!

Some Where Out There

CraZy-511 — Sun, 19 Apr 2009 19:59:00 +0000

I find it so strange how things are right now.

It feels as if she died.

And in a way, she has.

It isn’t easy to find the strength to say goodbye, to let go.

Yet I have to accept its over for good.

I know in my heart it can never and will never be again.

And it just hurts.

To hear an sms or a call and know it will never be her.

To not think about her or what she’s doing anymore because it doesn’t matter.

To not care or worry about her well-being because its none of your concern.

To never do all the things you used to do with her because she isn’t in your life.

To not be able to ask her how her day was because you don’t need to know.

To not rant about your shit or look to her for comfort because she doesn’t care.

To not love her anymore because there is no point.

To not be able to give a damn because you simply have no right.

Relationships that don’t work out seem stupid now.

There is never a guarantee that it will for a myriad of reasons.

Yet we fall into them, over and over again.

Ignoring the prospect of future pain.

Hoping that just because it looks like it and feels like it,

it might actually be ‘it’ this time.

But I’m naive that way,

I’ll never stop believing in possibilities.

It feels weird having to tuck her into my memory-box and seal it shut.

But that’s really the only way I can cope right now.

The only way to go on.

That way she will always stay beautiful to me.

Unmarred by the ugliness of what happened,

Untainted by the hurt, confusion and pain,

Untouched by the stranger she has become.

I know she’s out there, living and breathing

and laughing and smiling and enjoying her life.

But that person just isn’t her,

It simply can’t be.

The girl I will always love lives only in my past,

In my watercolour memories,

That’s the only place she will ever exist for me,

Because that is the only place she loved me.

And that is all I ever want to remember.

Tonight i realised a few things:

CraZy-511 — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 05:10:00 +0000

I don’t like feeling like a 3rd wheel
I miss getting trashed and being happy
I miss that someone caring about about me
I miss coming home to someone
I miss someone telling me that they love me
I miss feeling appreciated
I miss someone sharing what i love
I hate coming home to an empty bed
I hate realising that i am alone
I hate how i have to pretend like nothing happened
I hate pretending to not feel the way i feel
I hate knowing that it’ll never happen again.
I hate how small this world is.

Smile

CraZy-511 — Wed, 08 Apr 2009 14:32:00 +0000

- I hate -

- to see -

- the one -

- I love -

- happy with -

- somebody but -

- I surely -

- hate it -

- more to -

- see the -

- one I -

- love unhappy -

- with me -

Stay With Me

CraZy-511 — Sun, 29 Mar 2009 09:33:00 +0000

Stay with me

You couldn’t leave me here

Wait for me

I don’t wanna say goodbye

I wonder what it would be

If you were leaving me

O…oh…oh…oh

To me

You’re so sweet

Give me

Your loving

you are the only one

You’re the air that makes me breathe

In the air so I can breathe

Try to come and feel me

Hold me and touch me

My love

Stay with me

Care

CraZy-511 — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 20:44:00 +0000

I don’t care,
If life isn’t fair,
If you’re standing there,
Giving me that cold stare.

I don’t care at all,
If you’re thin or tall,
If you’re fat like a ball,
Whining about how you’re small.

I can’t be bothered,
If i was murdered,
And brutally hammered,
If only to be remembered;

By you, the only one I care,
You that made my life just fair,
You who was always there,
Giving me that lovely stare.